i am naturally an energetic person.
active since early life, i love to move, explore, adventure, and play. i zip around pretty constantly, expending energy like a mad woman. there are social gatherings to attend, mountains to climb, beer to drink, art to create and dance floors to pound. i visit my yoga mat frequently and step into my hoop daily.
tell me what slowing down means again?
on monday i fell asleep in the dentists chair and woke up without wisdom teeth.
at home, i resigned to the couch, puffy and swollen. the first day i enjoyed the doing nothing. i watched bad tv and ate ice cream. not moving felt easy to do.
tuesday sang a different story.
i rolled out of bed at 7:30 restless, swollen and in pain. by one o’clock i’d made a smoothie, read a magazine, watched a movie, meditated, collaged, and spent too much time on facebook. for the remainder of the day i found myself unable to stop flitting about the house. i was fidgety and uncomfortable, dreaming of outside and hooping and yoga and all the solid food i couldn’t eat.
essentially, the majority of tuesday was spent moping about the house, complaining of pain and boredom. my restlessness walked me into anxiety.
quite obviously, i am still learning how to appreciate regenerative moments.
what i failed to do yesterday was settle into this time of rest and relaxation with full appreciation. realistically, life cannot always be about the next big adventure. it also includes those quiet moments in which silence and stillness are your only company. life rests in balance.
slowing down allows for the body and spirit to reconnect. it gives the heart space to whisper its language. slowing down allows me to see the whole picture and teaches me to appreciate the subtleties of existence.
in all honesty, when i listen, i hear how desperately my body and mind call for stillness. wisdom teeth must hold wisdom because i definitely learned a solid lesson this week — as much as i know how to play, i must also learn how to rest, and recover, regardless of whether i just had surgery.
today i woke up more peaceful. i woke up more settled in the idea that not moving is okay and even necessary for right now. i woke up knowing, seeing, and understanding that i will, eventually very soon, be able to move freely again, and that this period of time is a gift.
all this sitting and being doesn’t seem too bad today.
now, let’s see how this lesson applies when i get my tonsils out next month…!
wishing you a restful mid-week.