a week in emotion

i am impatient with my negative emotions

(my feet and last year’s summer sky)

i get frustrated with them
like i might get frustrated
with a screaming child
(that is seriously frustrating)

this week i managed to feel
energized
sluggish
unhappy
thrilled
electric
magnetic
childish
insecure

and
isolated
(mercury retrograde loves me)

yesterday
in particular
taught me to slow down
to simmer
until those uncomfortable feelings
evaporated

i relearned the lesson of giving sadness room to breathe
(and
when you have a history with depression,
feeling sad can be
doubly uncomfortable)

sometimes negativity won’t have a reason for existing
outside of
simply needing to breathe out of you

is it fun?
no

it it comfortable?
not at all

is it doable?
yes

committing to feeling sad
sounds really silly
but
it’s really, really necessary
to honor all emotions
good and bad
if we are to ever objectively embrace our feelings

i ended the day relatively peaceful
only because i forced myself
to be uncomfortable
for a few hours

i’m still uncomfortable now
yet
trying

that’s all we can really ever do:
try

do you feel all your feelings? do you struggle? how do you cope?

much love,

zoe

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This entry was published on July 15, 2012 at 10:16 pm. It’s filed under emotions and stuff, head trips, rambles and writing, sunday superlatives, thoughts and musings and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

4 thoughts on “a week in emotion

  1. I’m still learning to feel all my feelings. Some of them are still so new to me, ones I used to think were fake and made up for television and stories. It’s pretty crazy when I feel things I used to genuinely believe were fiction and lies. Admittedly I don’t always sit with some of these more awkward emotions, although I am writing a private journal now, one nobody will ever see, and it’s helping me figure some of those out a little more.

  2. Glad you’re back. I randomly decided to check your old blog and found this out :D Very happy I did so.

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